Why the Interest in Spiritual Warfare & the Demonic?
I've been studying spiritual warfare and the demonic (along with a range of traditional Catholic topics) ever since I came back to the Catholic Church in May of 2020. Some of the reasons for my interest in these topics include:
- I had direct personal experience with the demonic when I was involved in the occult and I was still confused about some of the things that had happened to me.
- I was experiencing a lot of spiritual warfare (and actually still do) because of the many doors I had opened during my time in the occult and needed to learn more about how to deal with it.
- I love to read and take notes and learn new things. One of the best feelings I know is the one you get when things that didn't make sense before finally start to fall into place.
Why I Almost Didn't Blog on These Topics
When I first started this blog almost two years ago, I called it New Age to Catholic. Mostly because I didn't want to admit that most of what I had been doing in the "New Age" was plain and unadulterated occultism. While it can be successfully argued that the New Age is filled with occult practices, there is no debating the fact that what I was doing was darker.
There was a part of me that just didn't want to admit that. And even after I came to terms with it, I didn't want to blog about it for the following reasons.
I thought people would consider a blog about such topics weird or dark.
And, the truth is, some do. They aren't completely wrong either because demons are dark. The problem is, pretending they don't exist only make it easier for them to operate. I still don't like the idea of being judged, however - and that is something that enemy has used against me over and over again.
I was afraid I'd experience an uptick in spiritual warfare. This has happened. A couple days after I renamed the blog, I was so anxious about how people would react to it that I almost took it down. At 3 in the morning! Then I realized how over the top that kind of anxiety was. I've been writing and speaking publicly on various platforms since 2010 so it's very out of character for me to worry that much about anything I say online.
This wasn't the only episode of spiritual warfare I had to deal with but it was an instance that was relatively easy to fix. My anxiety faded quickly as I recited the Rosary in Latin and I fell asleep without deleting the site.
I was afraid that other Catholics would tell me I had no business writing on spiritual warfare & demonic influence
I haven't dealt with this directly as of yet, but I do know that many priests and exorcists have reservations about people who become overly interested in spiritual warfare and the demonology. And I do understand this concern. Especially because a lot of people are drawn to dark topics and it can cause problems.
Adam Blai, a psychologist and Church sanctioned lay demonologist deals with this issue in the question and answer section in the back of his very helpful book Possession, Exorcism and Hauntings (affiliate link).
Q: How do I become a demonologist? A: Why would you want to? Many people in the paranormal community, and in the public, seem to think demonology is "cool" or "exciting" or will make them famous. These reasons fade very quickly for those who actually meet a demon. Being a demonologist is a spiritual calling that leads one to live part of their life in nightmare environments of intense physical, emotional, and spiritual suffering that people go through. People don't choose to be demonologists or exorcists; God makes people demonologists or exorcists.
I don't necessarily disagree with the points made here. Because Blai is a practicing psychologist and a demonologist, I believe that he does see a LOT of suffering and I commend him for the work that he does. While I am certainly not an expert, however, I still feel called to share my own personal experience.
I was worried that it might be a slippery slope.
This, I think, is the concern most priests have when a member of their flock develops an interest in demonology, spiritual warfare or related topics - which I completely understand. There are many different ways that the devil can trip us up and I know, from experience, that people with an interest in the dark topics are definitely at risk.
But I don't think that ignorance is the answer. And I don't think that we can escape the devil's notice by keeping a low profile, either. Instead, I am convinced that our safety lies in our devotion to our Catholic faith. The more experience we have topics like this, the more focused our spiritual life needs to be. Some people may be able to get by as lukewarm Catholics. Those of us who have tiptoed through the dark cannot. To me, this alone is worth sharing.
Why I Decided to Blog on this Topic
It's one thing to read about spiritual warfare and the demonic, however, and another thing to publicly blog on it.
When I first started talking about my past experience in the occult, I didn't go into any real detail about my own experience with demons. But as time passed I began to become more and more aware of the degree of demonic activity in our society as a whole. And it concerned me.
So I decided that it made sense to talk about what had happened to me and what I am learning about it in hopes it will be of some use to others. In upcoming posts, I'll be sharing more about spiritual warfare and demonic influence from a Catholic perspective. So please do check back!
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To read my the abridged version of my testimony about my experience in the New Age and occult, please click here.
The Ghost of Tauriana
Bishop Felix…said that he had been told of such a case by a saintly priest who was still living two years ago in the diocese of Centum Cellae as pastor of the Church of St. John in Tauriana [Italy]. This priest used to bathe in the hot springs of Tauriana whenever his health required. One day, as he entered the baths, he found a stranger there who showed himself most helpful in every way possible, by unlatching his shoes, taking care of his clothes, and furnishing him towels after the hot bath.After several experiences of this kind, the priest said the himself: ‘It would not do for me to appear ungrateful to this man who is so devoted in his kind services to me. I must reward him in some way.’ So one day he took along two crown-shaped loaves of bread to give him.When he arrived at the place, the man was already waiting for him and rendered the same services he had before. After the bath, when the priest was again fully dressed and ready to leave, he offered the man the present of bread, asking him kindly to accept it as a blessing, for it was offered a token of charity.But the man sighed mournfully and said, "Why do you give it to me, Father? That bread is holy and I cannot eat it. I who stand before you was once the owner of this place. It is because of my sins that I was sent back here as a servant. If you wish to do something for me, then offer this bread to almighty God, and so make intercession for me, a sinner. When you come back and do not find me here, you will know that your prayers have been heard."With these words he disappeared, thus showing that he was a spirit disguised as a man. The priest spent the entire week in prayer and tearful supplications, offering Mass for him daily. When he returned to the bath, the man was no longer to be found. This incident points out the great benefits souls derive from the Sacrifice of the Mass. Because of these benefits the dead ask us, the living, to have Masses offered for them, and even show us by signs that it was through the Mass that they were pardoned.
My Takeaway
Making Amends
Amends is a synonym of reparation. As nouns the difference between reparation and amends is that reparation is (usually in plural) a payment of time, effort or money to undo past transgression(s) while amends is compensation for a loss or injury; recompense; reparation.
Purgatory on Earth?
"A very probable opinion,” says St. Thomas, “and one which, moreover, corresponds with the words of the saints in particular revelation, is that Purgatory has a double place for expiation. The first will be destined for the generality of souls, and is situated below, near to Hell; the second will be for particular cases, and it is from thence that so many apparitions occur.” (Suppl., part. 3, ques. ult.). The holy Doctor admits, then, like so many others who share his opinions, that sometimes Divine Justice assigns a special place of purification to certain souls, and even permits them to appear either to instruct the living or to procure for the departed the suffrages of which they stand in need; sometimes also for other motives worthy of the wisdom and mercy of God.
What Spirits Want
- The conversation between the living and the dead was limited to the topic of sin, making amends and the request for prayer and Masses. The priest in the story didn't try to contact the spirit again in order to satisfy his own curiosity. Instead, this man of God immediately turned to prayer and supplication and the offering of the Mass. This, in my opinion, is a lesson to us all.
- The spirit said he had been sent to the bathhouse. This is consistent with the fact that the departed appear to us ONLY by the grace of God. They do not chose to be here. We do not summon them. Nor do we see them because we have some special ability that others lack. It is up to God to assign a departed soul to heaven, hell or purgatory. And it is up to Him to allow them to contact the living (though, judging from Luke 16:19-31, it seems that those in hell are not granted this privilege).
- The departed could not eat and, in this case, was unable to take the "holy bread." To me, this sounds like a reminder that the dead cannot receive the Host. This lines up with the Catholic teaching on purgatory, as I understand it. In contrast with our earthly life, once in purgatory we cannot actively develop virtue, but are only able to be passively purified of sin. This is why the holy souls in purgatory need our prayers!
- The Dialogues of St. Gregory (affiliate link) is available on Amazon as is Purgatory Explained (affiliate link) by Rev. Fr. F. X. Schouppe S.J. The Dialogues can also be found for free online.
- Please note that if you purchase through one of my affiliate links, I may earn a small commission at no cost to you.
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This is the cover for my new Latin-English Rosary ebooklet.
The Latin-English Rosary ebooklet I'm planning will be an expanded version of my shop's Latin-English Rosary trifold. The ebooklet will be available for digital download and formatted for Kindle or other ereaders. I decided to create a second Latin-English Rosary resource because, while people like the trifold, it really only works as a printable.
This would be my next nonfiction project and my first self-published ebook. Though I'm not sure right now just when it will be done.
I also wanted to let everyone know that my new 54 Day Novena printable booklet is finished. I will be listing it in the shop next week!
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